Went to the gym this morning and I made plans with my girlfriend to go to see the movie Bridesmaids this afternoon. I am really looking forward to seeing this as I have heard its really funny! I will let you know. When I got home and told Steve my plans, he didn't say a word but I know what he was thinking..."better you than me!" This is definitely not a movie that my hubs would enjoy!
It will be good to get out for a bit as I am a little sad today actually. My mom called me last night to tell me that my older cousin died yesterday. She had been diagnosed with bone cancer about 4 months ago and never came home from the hospital. Its very sad. She has two children, 28 and 30 who have now lost both their parents. My heart goes out to both of them. My mom and sister will be going to the wake and I wish I could also go.
This cousin, while I haven't seen her in about 5 years was very special to me. She lived a wild life and for a while, when I was young, she lived with us. It was pretty cool for my sister and I to have a hip, older cousin living in the house with us. This was during the mid-seventies and she had the best platform high heels ever! Draz, you would so approve! Her mother died about 3 years ago and I have to say, I don't think she was ever the same again. She was very close to her mom and her mother was like a protector to her. She was always getting into some kind or trouble or other and her mother would always be there. When her mom died, she really didn't have anyone to go to for help. She was really a troubled soul if there ever was one. She had 1 older brother and 2 younger ones but its not the same as your mother. Anyway, I will miss you Cherie....you were a special person and will be missed.
Another thing that is bothering me this weekend is that Memorial Day was always something special when we lived on LI. It signified the being of summer and cookouts. There was always something going on at my house, my sisters house or my mothers house in addition to friends having get-to-gethers. Since moving to FL, I find that its not such a big deal and it really makes me miss being up north with my family.
Anyway, I am looking forward to seeing the movie today and will let you all know how it is. I am sure Steve and I will be going for a bike ride this weekend and making our own memories right here in FL.
Have a great holiday weekend!
Friday, May 27, 2011
Thursday, May 26, 2011
Excuse me but, was yesterday Fat Tuesday?
or is my calendar f'ed up because I certainly ate like it was!
The day started out like any other Wednesday, I went to the gym and came home and had a yogurt. Thats where the good eating and exercise habits ended! I was running around during the day and had 1/2 of a 6 in. hero (they call them Subs down here but its a hero!) from Publix (almost ate the whole thing, not quite. Thank goodness for C at work!). Dinner was: 2 chinese spareribs, about 2 forkfuls of fried rice, 3/4 egg roll and 2 dumplings! Are you kidding me? I did feel some restriction though when the last bite of food went in! Oh boy! I even caught myself falling into the period right before my banding surgery when I said to Steve "well, it will be a while before I can have this again!"
My goal is to not gain any weight during these 3 weeks while waiting for VSG surgery and being totally unfilled. I managed to stay at the same weight for 5 weeks when I was unfilled in January/Feb so I really need to do this now.
In other news, I am totally addicted to the Casey Anthony trial that is going on here in Central Florida. I have been following her case since the Summer of 2008 when her adorable 2.5 y/o daughter went missing and ultimately whose body was found in Dec of 2008. It is a horrible story and makes me so mad and upset. I know we live in a country where you are supposed to be innocent until proven guilty but come on? It took them 2 weeks to find an impartial group of people who are her jurors. I didnt think it could be done. Anyway, if you don't know about the case, and are interested in making yourself crazy like me, just tune in to Nancy Grace on HLN at 8...
The day started out like any other Wednesday, I went to the gym and came home and had a yogurt. Thats where the good eating and exercise habits ended! I was running around during the day and had 1/2 of a 6 in. hero (they call them Subs down here but its a hero!) from Publix (almost ate the whole thing, not quite. Thank goodness for C at work!). Dinner was: 2 chinese spareribs, about 2 forkfuls of fried rice, 3/4 egg roll and 2 dumplings! Are you kidding me? I did feel some restriction though when the last bite of food went in! Oh boy! I even caught myself falling into the period right before my banding surgery when I said to Steve "well, it will be a while before I can have this again!"
My goal is to not gain any weight during these 3 weeks while waiting for VSG surgery and being totally unfilled. I managed to stay at the same weight for 5 weeks when I was unfilled in January/Feb so I really need to do this now.
In other news, I am totally addicted to the Casey Anthony trial that is going on here in Central Florida. I have been following her case since the Summer of 2008 when her adorable 2.5 y/o daughter went missing and ultimately whose body was found in Dec of 2008. It is a horrible story and makes me so mad and upset. I know we live in a country where you are supposed to be innocent until proven guilty but come on? It took them 2 weeks to find an impartial group of people who are her jurors. I didnt think it could be done. Anyway, if you don't know about the case, and are interested in making yourself crazy like me, just tune in to Nancy Grace on HLN at 8...
Monday, May 23, 2011
FYI - BLOG is open again!
Making the blog private was just too much work and defeats the purpose of why I am blogging to begin with.
This blog is for me to talk about my weight loss journey and hopefully help others along the way. Oh well, I tried it and I didn't like it. Actually, I felt like I was in Siberia. But, I am back!
Not much going on here other than maintaining my weight since the unfill last week. Actually, I lost a few lbs this week. I went back to the gym on Saturday and I also went today but I decided to put my personal training and especially, put off CrossFit until after I get the all-clear from surgery. I figure that will be sometime in July. I can start walking immediately and than add in more aerobics at 2 weeks but he wants me to wait a few more weeks for the strength training to begin.
I was so happy to hear from Stephanie earlier today and to hear that all went well for her. Any kind of surgery sucks but to come home feeling pretty good is, well, pretty good! Yay Steph! Here's to a speedy recovery!
This blog is for me to talk about my weight loss journey and hopefully help others along the way. Oh well, I tried it and I didn't like it. Actually, I felt like I was in Siberia. But, I am back!
Not much going on here other than maintaining my weight since the unfill last week. Actually, I lost a few lbs this week. I went back to the gym on Saturday and I also went today but I decided to put my personal training and especially, put off CrossFit until after I get the all-clear from surgery. I figure that will be sometime in July. I can start walking immediately and than add in more aerobics at 2 weeks but he wants me to wait a few more weeks for the strength training to begin.
I was so happy to hear from Stephanie earlier today and to hear that all went well for her. Any kind of surgery sucks but to come home feeling pretty good is, well, pretty good! Yay Steph! Here's to a speedy recovery!
Update on Stephanie!!!
Quick update:
I received an email today from Stephanie, Dreams of Skinny High Heels and she is home from the hospital and feeling as well as can be expected. I would do a copy and paste of her email but being she was under the effects of Demerol, I chose not to! Actually, I was quite happy to see that she was as coherent as she was. Jason is being a very good nurse to her....I pray for Jason that she continues to be a good patient! She said he took some pics today and she will have him take more tomorrow when she goes back to the doc to have bandages removed. She will post them as soon as she can.
I look forward to Stephs blog where she will describe the procedure in only the way that Steph can. Until then, rest up Steph!
I received an email today from Stephanie, Dreams of Skinny High Heels and she is home from the hospital and feeling as well as can be expected. I would do a copy and paste of her email but being she was under the effects of Demerol, I chose not to! Actually, I was quite happy to see that she was as coherent as she was. Jason is being a very good nurse to her....I pray for Jason that she continues to be a good patient! She said he took some pics today and she will have him take more tomorrow when she goes back to the doc to have bandages removed. She will post them as soon as she can.
I look forward to Stephs blog where she will describe the procedure in only the way that Steph can. Until then, rest up Steph!
Sunday, May 22, 2011
I dont get it!
Today is my official weigh day and I am down 3 lbs for the week. I was totally unfilled last Tuesday and I lose. Go figure!
I had a great day yesterday. I went to the gym and then went to breakfast with my girlfriend. When I got home, my husband was climbing the walls because we had a crew of painters outside painting the house and Steve doesn't do well watching others work on his house. He gets very frustrated with the work ethic of many of the workers and he really is bothered by it. So, when he asked if I wanted to take a motorcycle ride down to Ponce Inlet I said sure.
We left the house around 12 and got home around 4. It was quite hot. I don't know for sure, but it was at least 90. It wasn't too bad riding along the ocean but whenever we had to stop, we literally baked as there was no breeze what-so-ever! We went to this neat little restaurant on the Inlet, Down the Hatch, and they had a Jimmy Buffet type band playing and we had lunch. We ordered the fried shrimp and chips basket, I ate the shrimp and he at the chips. Worked out great.
Today was a very lazy Sunday morning, I actually woke up at 7:30 which is late for me. Brutus usually wakes me at 6:30 but I guess he was sleeping in too! I went into work at 1 pm and got a really good prospect. He wants to see a house in Ponce Inlet! I was just there yesterday! That would have been so much more convenient as its 30+ miles away! Oh well, I will drive the miles to show the house as its on the Inlet so it will be very worth my time IF they buy it.
Checked in with the whole family up North and everyone is doing good. Its so much easier for me to live 1100 miles away when life is calm!
Hope everyone had a great weekend!
I had a great day yesterday. I went to the gym and then went to breakfast with my girlfriend. When I got home, my husband was climbing the walls because we had a crew of painters outside painting the house and Steve doesn't do well watching others work on his house. He gets very frustrated with the work ethic of many of the workers and he really is bothered by it. So, when he asked if I wanted to take a motorcycle ride down to Ponce Inlet I said sure.
We left the house around 12 and got home around 4. It was quite hot. I don't know for sure, but it was at least 90. It wasn't too bad riding along the ocean but whenever we had to stop, we literally baked as there was no breeze what-so-ever! We went to this neat little restaurant on the Inlet, Down the Hatch, and they had a Jimmy Buffet type band playing and we had lunch. We ordered the fried shrimp and chips basket, I ate the shrimp and he at the chips. Worked out great.
Today was a very lazy Sunday morning, I actually woke up at 7:30 which is late for me. Brutus usually wakes me at 6:30 but I guess he was sleeping in too! I went into work at 1 pm and got a really good prospect. He wants to see a house in Ponce Inlet! I was just there yesterday! That would have been so much more convenient as its 30+ miles away! Oh well, I will drive the miles to show the house as its on the Inlet so it will be very worth my time IF they buy it.
Checked in with the whole family up North and everyone is doing good. Its so much easier for me to live 1100 miles away when life is calm!
Hope everyone had a great weekend!
Friday, May 20, 2011
Bougie? What the hell is a Bougie?
Oh don't you worry...I found out! I was reading VSG blogs and VerticalSleeveSurgeryTalk.com (sound familiar?) and it was like I needed to know this...everywhere I looked, I kept seeing reference to this bougie (pronounced boo-zhe', its French) thing with a size next to it 32, 34, 36, 38, 40 up to 50. It didn't take me long to figure out it was the appliance, for lack of a better word that is used during the VSG surgery to guide the surgeon in the size of the stomach that he is molding. As in everything else in WLS, every Doc has a reason for using the size he uses. I spoke to my doctor and he explained to me more about bougie's than I really needed to know but most important that complications have a direct correlation to the size of the bougie that was used. Suffice to say, with all my band problems with tightness, I was relieved that my Doc will not be using the smallest one! Anyway, without going into specific numbers, I am comfortable with what size bougie is being used on me!
Its funny how I feel like I am experiencing DeJaVu' all over again with my researching of this procedure. I am over at OH, verticalsleevesurgerytalk.com and of course the blogs. This forum has been the most helpful and informative source of information for me during my whole journey and the personal friendships that I have forged here are beyond what I could describe in a few words. What brought us all together in the first place was our profound need and desire to lose weight and get healthy. The fact that we did it with a LapBand or VSG or Weight Watchers or whatever was secondary.
The funniest part about this week is that although I was unfilled on Tuesday, I am down 2 lbs! Crazy but I will take it!
Its funny how I feel like I am experiencing DeJaVu' all over again with my researching of this procedure. I am over at OH, verticalsleevesurgerytalk.com and of course the blogs. This forum has been the most helpful and informative source of information for me during my whole journey and the personal friendships that I have forged here are beyond what I could describe in a few words. What brought us all together in the first place was our profound need and desire to lose weight and get healthy. The fact that we did it with a LapBand or VSG or Weight Watchers or whatever was secondary.
The funniest part about this week is that although I was unfilled on Tuesday, I am down 2 lbs! Crazy but I will take it!
Wednesday, May 18, 2011
New Surgery Date!
I was at my internists office this morning when my surgeons office called me asking if I'd like to move the date up for my band removal/VSG surgery to 6/17! Ok, sure, why not? Yesterday I had to go to the surgeons office to pick up some forms and out of the blue, the staff tells me "Dr. D wants to drain your band today". What? I was at a loss for words as I really wasn't thinking along those lines but when I thought about it, especially with my history, of course he'd want it drained ahead so there would be no swelling. Made sense. I have to admit, when he stuck the needle in, I wasn't sad that it would be the last time I'd have to have a needle stuck into my port!
I met with the Nutritionist also while I was there and basically, the whole way of eating post-surgery is almost identical to what we had to do with the band except I have to do it for a longer period. At first I was told that I'd have to do a liquid diet the week before the surgery but my Dr told me no, I did not have to do this as my liver was fine, thank you very much! I have to ask my Dr. if I'll make it into the record books by hopefully, getting to goal during the post-surgery eating phase. It is very possible as I am only 10 lbs away from goal! Seriously though, I just pray that this surgery allows me to do what I was hoping my band would do....not only lose this weight but keep it off for life! The VSG is no different than the band in that it is only a tool and I will have to work on my head the rest of my life or until they come out with a surgery to fix that too!
I am so happy my daughter Mallory is blogging now. Her blog is I spin for cookies and being newly married, I think blogging will give her a way to control her weight so she doesn't end up like her mama. Both of my girls are thin but knowing where they come from will help them stay on top of it. I have met the greatest bunch of women and men through this blog and I pray that she too will be able to make some lasting friendships with women who have the same struggles as she does.
Tuesday, May 17, 2011
New Blogger Needs Support!
Hi everyone! My daughter Mallory has started a blog called I spin for cookies and can use our support! Please stop over and say hello!
I am going to visit a nutritionist today as part of my pre-surgical requirements. I am assuming that the whole eating process with VSG is the same or perty darn close to band eating. Everything I've read is the same. I will report back later on it. Now that I have made up my mind to do this, I just want 6/24 to be here and than I just want the next 4 weeks to fly by so I can get past the healing process. I.Am.Not.Looking.Forward.To.That.
I am going to visit a nutritionist today as part of my pre-surgical requirements. I am assuming that the whole eating process with VSG is the same or perty darn close to band eating. Everything I've read is the same. I will report back later on it. Now that I have made up my mind to do this, I just want 6/24 to be here and than I just want the next 4 weeks to fly by so I can get past the healing process. I.Am.Not.Looking.Forward.To.That.
Monday, May 16, 2011
Ok, where do I start?
I guess I will start with the easy stuff and work my way up from there.
Steve and I spent the last 5 days visiting with our children, sister and family as last Wednesday marked the 1 year anniversary of the death of my dad and brother-in-law. We had a memorial service for them but other than that, it was just another "first" that we got through. Nothing more to report other than we are all 'ok' and life really does go on.
The day before we left for NY I had an appt. with my Dr. for a fill. It was quite surreal in retrospect actually. He comes in the room, sits down and almost immediately tells me that his opinion is that my band has failed me and that he attributes my willpower and determination for my weight loss this past year and not the band! I think at this point, the blood drained out of my face and I started to cry!
Let me interject that my Dr. has told me in the past that he doesn't think I will ever get to a point with restriction where I will just be on auto-pilot. Basically for the past year the cycle has been, get a fill, I am fine and than my body swells, the band becomes too tight, I get unfilled, I am too loose, I go back for a fill and the process repeats itself. I know this is not the way I imagined life with my band. He went on to tell me that he will continue to take care of me and do the cycle but he just doesn't think its fair to me to have to go see him every month like I do for fills/unfills. He is right of course.
He has brought up Vertical Sleeve Gastrectomy (VSG) many times in the past but the thought of surgery, again, has always deterred me from really seriously considering it. However, this time, when he brought it up, it was my husband who really convinced me that I should consider this as an alternative. My doctor believes that my band will have to come out eventually and if I wait until a crisis, such as I had in January, I may end up needing emergency surgery to have it removed or at the very least, all the fluid removed. With all the swelling that was involved, I would have to wait to have another surgery for the VSG and who knows how much weight I might gain in the mean time if that happened. This is my biggest fear (isn't it everyones?) band is removed and all the weight comes back. I refuse for that to happen.
So, after much research and soul-searching, I have an appt. to have VSG surgery on 6/24. I am scared because it is a much more invasive surgery than the band was but I think in the long-run, I will be able to enjoy my life at a healthy BMI and not have to be consumed with counting calories, fills/unfills for the rest of my life. I so wanted to get to goal and be able to maintain my fill level like so many others but it isn't happening. Once I get past the surgery and healing phase of VSG, I think I will be able to do just that.
Also, another perk for me will be that I will be able to sleep on my left side again. Something that since getting the band has eluded me due to my port being on that side. I honestly don't know if it's just me, but sleeping in that position always causes pain/soreness, especially, the thinner I get. It will be a welcomed change, that is for sure.
Anyway, because of this new development, I wanted to privatize my blog because there are some people in my private life whom I would just assume didn't know about the revision to VSG. I have told some friends about the band but would prefer to just tell those friends and family that need to know and not have to explain myself to others who don't really understand why I had WLS in the first place.
So, please humor me when I am talking about VSG but always know that I am a life-long member of BOOB's! Nothing will ever change that!
Steve and I spent the last 5 days visiting with our children, sister and family as last Wednesday marked the 1 year anniversary of the death of my dad and brother-in-law. We had a memorial service for them but other than that, it was just another "first" that we got through. Nothing more to report other than we are all 'ok' and life really does go on.
The day before we left for NY I had an appt. with my Dr. for a fill. It was quite surreal in retrospect actually. He comes in the room, sits down and almost immediately tells me that his opinion is that my band has failed me and that he attributes my willpower and determination for my weight loss this past year and not the band! I think at this point, the blood drained out of my face and I started to cry!
Let me interject that my Dr. has told me in the past that he doesn't think I will ever get to a point with restriction where I will just be on auto-pilot. Basically for the past year the cycle has been, get a fill, I am fine and than my body swells, the band becomes too tight, I get unfilled, I am too loose, I go back for a fill and the process repeats itself. I know this is not the way I imagined life with my band. He went on to tell me that he will continue to take care of me and do the cycle but he just doesn't think its fair to me to have to go see him every month like I do for fills/unfills. He is right of course.
He has brought up Vertical Sleeve Gastrectomy (VSG) many times in the past but the thought of surgery, again, has always deterred me from really seriously considering it. However, this time, when he brought it up, it was my husband who really convinced me that I should consider this as an alternative. My doctor believes that my band will have to come out eventually and if I wait until a crisis, such as I had in January, I may end up needing emergency surgery to have it removed or at the very least, all the fluid removed. With all the swelling that was involved, I would have to wait to have another surgery for the VSG and who knows how much weight I might gain in the mean time if that happened. This is my biggest fear (isn't it everyones?) band is removed and all the weight comes back. I refuse for that to happen.
So, after much research and soul-searching, I have an appt. to have VSG surgery on 6/24. I am scared because it is a much more invasive surgery than the band was but I think in the long-run, I will be able to enjoy my life at a healthy BMI and not have to be consumed with counting calories, fills/unfills for the rest of my life. I so wanted to get to goal and be able to maintain my fill level like so many others but it isn't happening. Once I get past the surgery and healing phase of VSG, I think I will be able to do just that.
Also, another perk for me will be that I will be able to sleep on my left side again. Something that since getting the band has eluded me due to my port being on that side. I honestly don't know if it's just me, but sleeping in that position always causes pain/soreness, especially, the thinner I get. It will be a welcomed change, that is for sure.
Anyway, because of this new development, I wanted to privatize my blog because there are some people in my private life whom I would just assume didn't know about the revision to VSG. I have told some friends about the band but would prefer to just tell those friends and family that need to know and not have to explain myself to others who don't really understand why I had WLS in the first place.
So, please humor me when I am talking about VSG but always know that I am a life-long member of BOOB's! Nothing will ever change that!
Monday, May 9, 2011
CrossFit
I made the decision today to put my personal training on hold when my current 12-pack of sessions expire next week. I have been thinking that I don't think I am getting everything out of my sessions that I think I should.
So, I decided that I would look into CrossFit. We have one here in Ormond. I have been listening to Camille talk about her experience with it, great, and now Carmen is also going. I was telling my daughter what I was thinking and my daughter, who is very much into physical fitness and supports me in everything I do said "are you crazy?". Lol. Thanks Mallory, that made me decide that yes, maybe I am so I may as well be the fittest crazy mama I can be.
Steve and I met with Tish, the owner, who is my age and began doing CrossFit 6 years ago. She told me she eats between 2500 - 3000 calories every day! She looks like she doesn't have 1 oz of extra fat on her and she looks great! I have an appt. For a consult with her in two weeks. She told me my ankle concerns her but we can work with it and around it if need be.
So, wish me luck! It really sounds like a great program, costs less than what I am paying my trainer and will get me to my weight/fitness goal. I am also going in to get what I hope is a big girl fill next week. I hope my doc is in an agreeable mood! fingers crossed!
So, I decided that I would look into CrossFit. We have one here in Ormond. I have been listening to Camille talk about her experience with it, great, and now Carmen is also going. I was telling my daughter what I was thinking and my daughter, who is very much into physical fitness and supports me in everything I do said "are you crazy?". Lol. Thanks Mallory, that made me decide that yes, maybe I am so I may as well be the fittest crazy mama I can be.
Steve and I met with Tish, the owner, who is my age and began doing CrossFit 6 years ago. She told me she eats between 2500 - 3000 calories every day! She looks like she doesn't have 1 oz of extra fat on her and she looks great! I have an appt. For a consult with her in two weeks. She told me my ankle concerns her but we can work with it and around it if need be.
So, wish me luck! It really sounds like a great program, costs less than what I am paying my trainer and will get me to my weight/fitness goal. I am also going in to get what I hope is a big girl fill next week. I hope my doc is in an agreeable mood! fingers crossed!
Sunday, May 8, 2011
Happy Mothers Day!
Lets face it...whether we are mothers or not, we all mother someone in our lives, right? My little furbaby started my day off with a big wet kiss - what more can any mother want?
I received my first "Mother-in-law" mothers day card and I thought that was so sweet. I did tell him though, in the future, he should save his money and make my daughter just put his name with hers! "Good idea" my new son-in-law said!
I know I've talked a lot about my Dad on my blog but today is about my mama. Her name is Bunny (it's really Evelyn and maybe someday I'll tell that story!) and she is the best mama a girl can have. She is always there for us...she's been on double duty this past year! She is the most selfless person, always putting others first. This is not always a good thing, but its my mom. She is loved by all....even her garbage men who actually bring the cans up her driveway after they empty them on trash day. Unbelievable! I think it has something to do with her giving them her famous 'Bunny's Sausage Bread'! It is definitely from my mom that I get my love of cooking! She is truly the 'Wind beneath my wings' and I love her more than I could ever say!
Speaking about cooking, I am frosting some Tirimisu Cupcakes and then heading into work for a few hours. No rest for the weary over here! We are than going to our friends house for dinner where I am planning on eating one of the aforementioned Tirimisu Cupcakes! Don't worry, I will plan for them in my calorie bank accordingly. I have not plugged in the recipe to my fitness pal yet and I am thinking the result will not be pretty! Oh well, its not something I do everyday so I will deal with it! (I just ran the numbers and it came out to 238 calories per serving....not as bad as I thought!)
I know we are having some kind of roast chicken for dinner tonight so I will just plan my breakfast and lunch accordingly. I am still sticking to a 1200 calorie a day and I will not be going to the gym today. I didn't go yesterday either but I went for a 5 mile walk on the beach with two of my girlfriends. I will be back at the gym tomorrow at 6 a.m. for my training session.
I am actually at work now and forgot to take a picture of my cupcakes! They actually look fantastic so I will take a pic later and post it when I can!
Have a great Mother's Day everyone!
I received my first "Mother-in-law" mothers day card and I thought that was so sweet. I did tell him though, in the future, he should save his money and make my daughter just put his name with hers! "Good idea" my new son-in-law said!
I know I've talked a lot about my Dad on my blog but today is about my mama. Her name is Bunny (it's really Evelyn and maybe someday I'll tell that story!) and she is the best mama a girl can have. She is always there for us...she's been on double duty this past year! She is the most selfless person, always putting others first. This is not always a good thing, but its my mom. She is loved by all....even her garbage men who actually bring the cans up her driveway after they empty them on trash day. Unbelievable! I think it has something to do with her giving them her famous 'Bunny's Sausage Bread'! It is definitely from my mom that I get my love of cooking! She is truly the 'Wind beneath my wings' and I love her more than I could ever say!
Speaking about cooking, I am frosting some Tirimisu Cupcakes and then heading into work for a few hours. No rest for the weary over here! We are than going to our friends house for dinner where I am planning on eating one of the aforementioned Tirimisu Cupcakes! Don't worry, I will plan for them in my calorie bank accordingly. I have not plugged in the recipe to my fitness pal yet and I am thinking the result will not be pretty! Oh well, its not something I do everyday so I will deal with it! (I just ran the numbers and it came out to 238 calories per serving....not as bad as I thought!)
I know we are having some kind of roast chicken for dinner tonight so I will just plan my breakfast and lunch accordingly. I am still sticking to a 1200 calorie a day and I will not be going to the gym today. I didn't go yesterday either but I went for a 5 mile walk on the beach with two of my girlfriends. I will be back at the gym tomorrow at 6 a.m. for my training session.
I am actually at work now and forgot to take a picture of my cupcakes! They actually look fantastic so I will take a pic later and post it when I can!
Have a great Mother's Day everyone!
Friday, May 6, 2011
Its been a year already, can you believe it?
I just want to blink and be on the other side of the upcoming week. Last Mothers Day, I sat right where I am sitting now and I wrote a post about the "boys road trip" with pictures of my dad and husband. They were leaving on Mothers Day and riding their motorcycles up to Myrtle Beach to meet my brother-in-law for a few days of Bike Week. Two days later, on May 11, my father and brother-in-law were killed when they were sitting at a red light and were hit by a grown man who was texting. My family and I tell this story to everyone who will listen in the hope that it saves someones life. When you are texting while behind the wheel of a car, NO ONE IS DRIVING THE CAR!
This year has gone by so fast for my family. My sister continues to get up every morning and be an active participant in the human race but she has aged so much. My baby sister, who used to be so happy-go-lucky is just a shell of her old self. Her children, God bless them, are amazing young people and are doing the best they can do under the circumstances.
My sister and her daughter are coming to FL at the end of June and are going to Disney. This is a huge step in their healing process because Disney was my Brother-in-law Jimmy's favorite place. He even had a tattoo of Mickey on his arm! They had a weeks vacation planned for last August to celebrate my nephew and Brother in laws birthdays but none of them felt they could go. There is not one place they can not go in Disney and not feel his presence. Believe me, I know. He would always say, "When I die, I want to come back as a bird and live in the Magic Kingdom".
The hole in my heart is nothing compared to my sisters, I could not imagine the pain she feels, losing her husband of 22 years. I only know what it feels like to have a parent, a healthy active parent, ripped from my life in the blink of an eye. Not a day goes by that I don't think about my Dad. He was my hero. I hear his voice in my head all the time and pray that this doesn't go away. I still start to reach for the phone to call him and remember, he's not there anymore and it hurts as much today as it did a year ago, believe me.
The other tragedy in this story is my husband. He, too, will never be the same. He is truly suffering from 'survivor guilt'. He will be fine for months and than out of the blue, he just loses it. We were in the DMV recently and he started to cry, my big, tough cop, just started to cry.....said he let me and my sister down by not taking care of them. I tell him all the time, he did take care of them. Just not in the way that he thinks he should have. I cannot imagine what it would have been like if a stranger had called me that day to tell me they were dead or worse, if a stranger had called my sister. That would have been devastating. Steve staying in SC until the arrangements were made to bring our guys home. Yea, he took care of them, wouldn't you agree?
Anyway, we are going to NY to be with my sister next week for this horrible anniversary and we will be having a Mass/Memorial Service said in their names. Please keep my family in your thoughts and prayers on May 11th and remember, nothing is more important when you are driving as keeping your eyes on the road at all times.
I hope everyone has a very Happy Mothers Day and remember 'if Mama ain't happy, ain't nobody happy!
This year has gone by so fast for my family. My sister continues to get up every morning and be an active participant in the human race but she has aged so much. My baby sister, who used to be so happy-go-lucky is just a shell of her old self. Her children, God bless them, are amazing young people and are doing the best they can do under the circumstances.
My sister and her daughter are coming to FL at the end of June and are going to Disney. This is a huge step in their healing process because Disney was my Brother-in-law Jimmy's favorite place. He even had a tattoo of Mickey on his arm! They had a weeks vacation planned for last August to celebrate my nephew and Brother in laws birthdays but none of them felt they could go. There is not one place they can not go in Disney and not feel his presence. Believe me, I know. He would always say, "When I die, I want to come back as a bird and live in the Magic Kingdom".
The hole in my heart is nothing compared to my sisters, I could not imagine the pain she feels, losing her husband of 22 years. I only know what it feels like to have a parent, a healthy active parent, ripped from my life in the blink of an eye. Not a day goes by that I don't think about my Dad. He was my hero. I hear his voice in my head all the time and pray that this doesn't go away. I still start to reach for the phone to call him and remember, he's not there anymore and it hurts as much today as it did a year ago, believe me.
The other tragedy in this story is my husband. He, too, will never be the same. He is truly suffering from 'survivor guilt'. He will be fine for months and than out of the blue, he just loses it. We were in the DMV recently and he started to cry, my big, tough cop, just started to cry.....said he let me and my sister down by not taking care of them. I tell him all the time, he did take care of them. Just not in the way that he thinks he should have. I cannot imagine what it would have been like if a stranger had called me that day to tell me they were dead or worse, if a stranger had called my sister. That would have been devastating. Steve staying in SC until the arrangements were made to bring our guys home. Yea, he took care of them, wouldn't you agree?
Anyway, we are going to NY to be with my sister next week for this horrible anniversary and we will be having a Mass/Memorial Service said in their names. Please keep my family in your thoughts and prayers on May 11th and remember, nothing is more important when you are driving as keeping your eyes on the road at all times.
I hope everyone has a very Happy Mothers Day and remember 'if Mama ain't happy, ain't nobody happy!
Sunday, May 1, 2011
Enough with this maintaining Sh*t!
I have maintained the same weight give or take, since February! I am over it and starting today, I am a women on a mission - totally refocusing on me! It worked for the first 53 lbs and I know it will work for the last 12!
My total unfil in January started me on this path of maintenance, and believe me when I say, I am grateful and happy to know that I can maintain! I am able to eat EVERYTHING, just smaller portions. Bread, pasta, rice, no problem! I have the wedding behind me and my trip to Hawaii too....the one area that I have been very lax in is sweets. I have been eating something sweet almot every day and that ends today! Well, really yesterday as I am starting my "no sweets" as of this a.m. My gym is closed today so I will be back there tomorrow with my trainer at 6 a.m.
My next fill is scheduled for 5/16 and it cant come soon enough. My current fill level is still not even what it was on my first fill a year ago! No wonder I have no restriction! My doc and I decided to take it slow when I went for my first fill after the unfil but I think this is too slow. There has to be a point between what started my downward spiral and where I am today, right? He has given me two fills of .1 cc each time and I think I am going to ask him for .2 cc's when I see him. Just a little more but I think it will help.
I truly am very grateful for the 53 lbs I have lost over the last 13 months but I am even more grateful for the fact that I've been able to keep it off and maintain. Believe me, this has not been my MO in the past and I know its because of my band that I've been able to accomplish this, even if it feels like my band has not been consistently filled to a proper level. I am so confident that this was the right decision for me and I know I will be able to get to my goal weight. I've already gotten to my doctors goal for me and that in and of itself feels great.
Have a Happy Sunday!
My total unfil in January started me on this path of maintenance, and believe me when I say, I am grateful and happy to know that I can maintain! I am able to eat EVERYTHING, just smaller portions. Bread, pasta, rice, no problem! I have the wedding behind me and my trip to Hawaii too....the one area that I have been very lax in is sweets. I have been eating something sweet almot every day and that ends today! Well, really yesterday as I am starting my "no sweets" as of this a.m. My gym is closed today so I will be back there tomorrow with my trainer at 6 a.m.
My next fill is scheduled for 5/16 and it cant come soon enough. My current fill level is still not even what it was on my first fill a year ago! No wonder I have no restriction! My doc and I decided to take it slow when I went for my first fill after the unfil but I think this is too slow. There has to be a point between what started my downward spiral and where I am today, right? He has given me two fills of .1 cc each time and I think I am going to ask him for .2 cc's when I see him. Just a little more but I think it will help.
I truly am very grateful for the 53 lbs I have lost over the last 13 months but I am even more grateful for the fact that I've been able to keep it off and maintain. Believe me, this has not been my MO in the past and I know its because of my band that I've been able to accomplish this, even if it feels like my band has not been consistently filled to a proper level. I am so confident that this was the right decision for me and I know I will be able to get to my goal weight. I've already gotten to my doctors goal for me and that in and of itself feels great.
Have a Happy Sunday!
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)