Please come to my pity party!

I am getting "that feeling". You know the one I'm talking about? Is this band working for me or is this just another weight loss effort for the books? I seem to get on a roll and than it stops! My weight for the Meltdown Challenge was the same as it was two weeks ago! Granted, I gained last week and lost the same 1 lb this week so maybe I should look at the glass being half full?

I started working with the trainer this week so maybe that is a part of the problem of not really seeing a bigger loss. I also went out last night and had pizza, popcorn and a chocolate bar which has not been my normal night time eating pattern. I've been tracking my calories and while I had the calories for these foods, and with the exception of the one slice of pizza, they were not healthy at all! I know what I have to do and that is to look forward and not even think about how I used to deal with these setbacks and that is to just throw in the towel and say "fuck it!". Nope, that is not an option!

I have a lot going on this week and while I will be able to get in my 4 cardio sessions, I will only be able to work with the trainer on 2 days. Her schedule and mine were not meshing this week. Hopefully I will be able to do at least some of the things she had me working on last week. I'll ask her what I should be doing without her and then we will get back to our 3 sessions the week after.

I am sure the fact that I started out with a lower BMI than a lot of others is also a factor in my slow weight loss. I have lost 21 lbs in 13 weeks which is roughly 1.6lbs. per week. I know that my doc says a 1 - 2 lb loss per week should be the expectation and I am falling right in the middle and that should make me feel better, but....you know how it is. I want it NOW, damn it! I also have a fill on Thursday so maybe that will help ramp it up a notch in the weight-loss department.

Sorry about my rant, I just needed to get this out.

On a better note...I am so excited about my daughter Mallory and her fiance coming next Saturday for 5 days! My niece will be with them but Elayna will be staying another 5 days after Mallory leaves.

I want to make this a very special trip for Elayna as it is the first time she is travelling without her parents (she is only 14) and this will be her first trip since her dad, my brother-in-law, died. My husband Steve is tripping over himself coming up with ideas to keep us all busy. He is getting tickets for us to see a local play company perform "The Rocky Horror Picture Show". Should be interesting!

I'm hoping for a few beach and shopping days as we all know that any 14year old girl loves the beach AND especially shopping. We are also planning a great 4th of July at the ocean where there will be a fireworks display and we'll have a nice dinner on the beach. Other things we have planned is a 3 hour boat tour, a trip to the Alligator Farm (although I seem to be the only one excited about this!), going to the new movie theater that just opened (we saw Knight and Day with Tom Cruise and Cameron Diaz last night) and than doing whatever else she wants to do!

My girls are 23 and 19 so I shouldn't get too wiped out by being with a 14 y/o...famous last words, huh? Actually, my husband is the one who needs to be worried! No matter what, we will have fun and be making memories, that is what life is all about!

BYOC ala Drazil

1. This comes from my post yesterday about me bragging that I can still wear the same earrings I wore in high school….got me to wondering…how many piercings do you have? (the ones you can tell us about anyway – *wink wink)

I have 4...3 in one ear and 1 in the other ear. However, I only wear one in each ear. I would like to get my cartiledge pierced on the upper ear but I think I am too old for that! Same for my belly button...I love the look and I would love to get mine pierced when I hit goal but I probably won't do that either.

2. I’m asking this one because I’m getting another tattoo soon…and even have plans to get one of a lizard – my little Draz – because this blog and you all have become a major part of my life. Anywhoozle – how many tattoos do you have? If you have none and wanted to get one – what would it be?

Believe me, I NEVER had any desire to get a tattoo but after the accident that took my Dad and brother-in-law, I was compelled to get one that memorialized and honored them. This is on my lower back:



It hurt like a mutha so when my mother told me to save some skin for her tattoo when she dies I lovingly told her..."uh, I will be sending a card for now on! No more tattoos for this Chica...they hurt too much!" My daughters were so proud of me and said now I can't say anything about them getting tats! Wrongo, they don't know the old saying, "do as I say, not as I do", now do they?

3. If you’ve ever suffered from a weight-loss plateau, what’s your best advice to get past it?

Mix it up a little. Do this by either exercising more, eating more protein or eating less if thats the problem. Whatever you do, don't give up, that does not help plateaus, it must makes you gain weight!

4. This is a repeat. I liked last week’s challenge for BYOC and I saw a lot of people this week follow through on the promise they made last week. You pick one thing for just one day next week that you want to do….and mentally doing it for the one day can totally jump start more successes. And I feel like I can do anything for just one day.

I am going to keep going to the gym and working with Stacy, Jillian Michaels Evil Twin Sister! I will NEVER be the girl who loves exercise and skips into the gym but I do know that I feel great when I leave the gym even if I still can't skip to the car!

5. Repeat *make someone a Superstar* question – what's your favorite blog or comment of the week?

Although I didn't comment, Draz's post on Meds struck a very personal cord with me. I was one of those people who used to think people were weak (ex-husband in particular) who needed anti-depressants, until my own girls were in trouble and thanks to the help they received via medication and therepy, they are healthy young women today.

Yay! Exercise!

I am up .8 lbs today from yesterday and I am sure it is thanks to my session with Stacy! My muscles are SCREAMIN'! It may be TMI but even when I go to the bathroom, when I go to stand up, my legs just don't wanna get me there!

Steve and I had a few rough days (I was very mad at him) over the water temperature of our pool, it was 92 degrees. Its a long story but the outcome was/is I love that man and regardless of what the pool temp is, he is the best thing that has ever happened to me. That being said, he has since lowered the thermostat!

Anyway, we were able to salvage our date night last night and had a very nice dinner at an Italian restaurant near our home. We split an order of Veal Mezzaluna, oh sweet Jesus was that delish and a Ceasar salad! The veal was on a bed of spinach and had a slice of eggplant on top, with mozzerella cheese and was in a Marsala sauce. There gave us 2 pieces of veal which were probably 5 oz. each. Steve ate all of his and a piece of mine! My husband loves how much smaller our restaurant bills are since I got my band! In the past, we each would have ordered our own meal and would have eaten every last bite! He is thin but is like a dog when he eats...if it is in front of him, he will eat it whether he is hungry or not!

I ate a small end piece of the homemade garlic bread, some salad and 3/4 of the veal. I was comfortable, not full. What a great feeling that is! I figured out, to the best of my ability, the amount of calories I had yesterday and it came in under 1200. I also worked out and burned 500+ calories at the gym so all in all, it was a great day. Until I got on the scale and saw it was up .8 but I just have to go with it and know that when you weigh every day, their are fluctuations. I also think the soreness in my muscles is an indication that I am retaining water. Moving forward!

How can it be Wednesday?

Where the heck is the time going? Honestly, Wednesday? I don't know how I got things done when I had a 9 - 5 job...everyting had to be done on the weekends and somehow, it all got done. Being in Real Estate, I have no "set" hours but I am working a good part of most days, even weekends. Some weeks, I even make money! Trust me folks, I do miss my weekly paycheck BUT that would come with a vacation/time off allotment that I just cannot deal with. My babies are in New York and when mama needs to see them, I do not want to have to ask for time off. So, there you have it!

Anyway, I met with my trainer Stacy yesterday, she is such a sweet girl...NOT! Well, she was yesterday during our "get to know you" session. Actually, I already know her as I have attended her Butts, guts and glutes class many times so I really kind of knew that she is a killer! That's what I need. Today was my first 1/2 hour session with her and lets just say that I am glad that I got my 45 minutes on the Elliptical in before I saw her because there was no way that was going to happen when she was done with me. I am sure I will be thinking of her every minute of the day tomorrow when I try to move my sore muscles. Back again on Friday morning for more torture.

Yesterday I had lunch with Gail and she is absolutely adorable! You'll have to take my word for this as we both forgot to take a pic for our Blogs! Gail has lost 100+ lbs. in 10 months and is just rocking her band! What an amazing accomplishment for her and inspiration for me! She is so looking forward to coming to Chicago! I will hopefully see her before than as i have a few pairs of Capris that she will be wearing very soon that I forgot to bring with me yesterday! Age, that is all I am saying!

Monday, Monday

'Our Father, who art in Heaven,...I have been a very good girl and I would like to lose weight this week...Amen'

Lets see if this works!

I am going to the gym this afternoon and meeting with the trainer tomorrow. I am planning on at least 4 sessions at the gym this week maybe even 5. Hopefully, if the stall on the scale this past week was due to my increased exercise, my bod will start letting go some of my FAT this week! A girl can hope right?

I have a doctors appt next Thurs. 7/1 for a fill. It will be my third one and hopefully the one that gets me in the "zone". It will also only be 3 weeks since my last fill so I hope I am not rushing things along by going so soon. He wanted to see me in 4 weeks but I couldn't make it than and it would have been 6 weeks before I could get there again. He has been very aggressive with my first 2 fills so I'm thinking this next one will be a smallish one. We'll see.

I had a few "moments" on Fathers Day but came to the realization that God spared my husband Steve for a reason and I really need to move forward in my healing process. A major issue for me is that my husband has motorcycling in his blood as did my father and BIL. I have always enjoyed riding with him. Not so much the "riding" aspect of it but more of the closeness of having my arms around him and spending time with him. The only other person I rode on a motorcycle with in my life was my Dad. I felt safe with him as I do with Steve. The problem is, I don't feel safe anymore and I suffer from anxiety now when he goes out on his bike.

I am going to make it my mission to find a therapist who can help me work through these issues. The motorcycle was always a source of pleasure for me and now all it represents is pain. Because it means so much to my husband, I have to deal with this before it becomes a problem for my marriage. My initial thought is "I no longer feel safe on the motorcycle so you should feel the same way and respect my wishes and just sell the damn thing". For some reason, he doesn't feel the same way and I have to make sure that this doesn't become a major issue between us.

Quick Check In

I have logged in 4 45 minute exercise sessions this week and how does the scale thank me? By gaining 1.4 lbs!!! I know I was eating at or under my 1200 calorie daily allowance, I know I drank at least 8 mostly more glasses of water, my (.) came and WENT during the week so by all rights, I should have shown a drop! I did all cardio and no weights at the gym. Can you build muscle with cardio? Hmmm, I don't really know. In any event, this is another week and I am meeting with a personal trainer on Tuesday. Hopefully, the scale will be my friend next Sunday, yes?

Today is Fathers Day and as you all know it is the first for me without my Dad. I will be volunteering at our towns Seafood Festival so hopefully, I will be keeping busy. I miss my father so much it hurts. We had such a great relationship and having him gone so suddenly is very hard to deal with. I am at the point where I am seriously considering therapy as I am not dealing with this very well.

To those of you with Dads, have a great day honoring and loving him and to the rest, honor his memory and the great times you shared with him.

Happy Hump Day!

We had a very "good" trip to SC as we continue on our journey of healing. We met some really great people whose lives were forever touched by my Dad and Jimmy and they were able to answer some of our unanswered questions. Sure, my sister and I did some crying but I noticed for the first time that we laughed more than we cried. Its going to take a long time but I know that together, we can get through this. My Dad didn't raise two very strong women for nothing!

On the band front....I am headed to the gym in a little bit. I am aiming for 4 times this week. I am steering clear of step aerobics as I do not want to push my ankle too much. I am getting the itch to sign on with a personal trainer...thank you Miss Stephanie! Steve is gonna love you when I tell him! I actually like the idea of 1/2hour sessions though. In the past, when I did personal training I did it for an hour. Each session contained cardio and I absolutely can do that on my own. I really need the focus of the weights with a trainer.

My restriction seems to be holding up although I did notice my weight is up 1 lb today from Sunday. I didn't eat very healthy these past two days but I didn't eat very much either. I will admit, I ate a very small Moon Pie that I got at Cracker Barrel. Delish! It went right down without a problem. At dinner on Monday we had a free coupon for a Peach Cobbler at Sticky Fingers that we couldn't pass up so I also had a few spoonfulls of that! Hmmm...I better head out to the gym now!

Very emotional two days ahead...

A little later this morning, Steve and I will be going to pick up my sister at the Jacksonville, FL airport. We are then continuing to drive up to Mt. Pleasant SC right outside of Charleston, SC. This is where the accident happened that killed my Dad and Brother-in-law. What's more important to us than seeing the scene of the accident, tomorrow morning at 8 a.m. we will be meeting with a Dentist whose office is right at the accident scene. He was actually the first person on the scene and tried to give medical aid to my Dad but he was already gone. He than began CPR on Jimmy and continued until the Paramedics arrived.

We found out about him by reading the witness reports of the accident and felt a strong desire to meet him and to thank him for trying to help our family. I know it will be hard to do this as it is already stirring up our emotions but it is something that my sister and I feel we have to do.

My sister continues to take baby-steps in her healing process. She feels like she is crying more today that she was even two weeks ago. I think its because she was still in shock two weeks ago and now, the shock has worn off and reality has begun to set in. She was told that she didn't have to go back to work until September when the accident happened (she is a teacher) and while I originally thought that was wonderful in the beginning, I am now thinking she really needs to be busy and keep moving. She still has a lot of paperwork to file with Jimmy's employer for benefits and I plan on helping her with it during the car ride the next two days.

I wish I was in New York with her. I feel so helpless being the only family member in FL. We talk on the phone a few times every day. We were always close but this accident has brought us even closer if that's even possible. I lost my Dad and she lost her Dad and husband. I cannot imagine the hell she is living in. I thank God she has Eric and Elayna to keep her going. They are great kids and I love them both very much.

We will be home late tomorrow night so I will not be posting again until Wednesday.

Summer Meltdown

So, in the first week I have lost 5.6 lbs. I am sure a big part of that is the fill I had on Wed. and having to do liquids for 24 hours. I'll take it though!

We had an exhausting Open House extravaganza today and we are supposed to go to a restaurant for a cocktail party at 5. I am exhausted but figure I will get my second wind and not have to cook dinner in the process. Not a bad deal!

I will check back later! Have a great Sunday!

What is up with watermelon?

Really....watermelon? Getting stuck? I chewed it until it was water, which it practically is and the darn thing still wouldn't go down! In fact, a little sliming was the order of the day! Oh. My. God.

I went back to the gym this morning to test out my cortizone injected ankle and so far, so good. I am taking it one day at a time! I only did 2 miles on the treadmill for 30 minutes because I didn't want to strain it being the first time back in a few months. I than did a little upper body weight lifting. I felt so good! I will go back again tomorrow and do the same thing I'm thinking.

When I got home I was a little hungry so I made egg salad with one egg, greek yogurt, salt and pepper and spread it on one piece of toast. I ate 1/2 of it and was full! If this is restriction, I am in love! DH ate the other half which is a big thing because he never eats in the morning so nothing went to waste.

I'm heading to work in a bit so I will check back later. Have a great Saturday everyone!

Fill update, gross question and BYOC

So, my fill on Wednesday seems to be working but it really is too soon to tell as I was on liquids Wed, mushy on Thurs and today was day 1 of regular food. I did get the slightest bit stuck on chicken salad so I guess the saline DID go in the band! We went out to lunch with our friends today and I ordered an appetizer size order of crabcakes and ate one of the two and felt completely satisfied! So far, so good.

I do have a somewhat gross question. When I got a little stuck on the chicken salad I threw up a little. When this happens, it really is just a bunch of slime that comes up, none of the food. In fact, I have never thrown up the food that has made me stuck. Is this normal? Its also the most gentle vomiting I have ever experienced and it immediately makes the uncomfortable full feeling go away.

On to BYOC:

1. What was your first pet?

A little tan mutt we called Pebbles. She was the most prescious little thing!

2. When did you lose your virginity? (Okay – before you throw stones and break out the holy water – first of all – this is not my question. It came from a follower and I obliged cuz I like it…so there.) Obviously don’t answer if this is too personal…..but don’t hate me for putting it out there.

I was 18.

3 & 4 – I’m combining these two cuz this answer could be long. A follower (thanks Steph) asked if I could ask what a daily meal plan looks like for each of you – out of curiosity and out of possibly learning new foods to try.

b - yogurt or cottage cheese and hardboiled or scrambled egg. Occasionally oatmeal;
l - varies, tuna, chicken or egg salad are always a good standby. Sometimew on a piece of toast but most times, not. If I am going out, it can be anything;
d - protein and veggie;
s - can be fruit or cheese. I have also been known to have a Skinny Cow or other treat on more than one occasion too :)


5. Repeat question: What blog or blog comment stayed with you or stuck with you the most this week and why?

Definitely Draz's "Hide and Seek" blog.

Good (for the moment) and Great News!

First, the good for the moment news is my ankle surgery has been temporarily averted! I still don't really understand what exactly is wrong with it but the Doc showed me some "stuff" between my leg bone and my ankle bone on the MRI that should not be there. He said it is rare to have this in the area that I do. Lucky me, huh? It has to do with cartiledge and he mentioned a possibility of "dead bone" somewhere or other. Anyway, he explained I have 3 choices: 1. do nothing which is not acceptable to me or him, 2. cortisone injection which will possibly take care of the problem (very remote chance of this happening) and at the very least, give me some comfort for a little while, and 3. surgery.

I opted for the cortisone injection and both the doc and Steve agreed. If nothing else, the insurance will probably require that I try an alternative treatment to surgery. Can I tell you, that needle hurt like hell! Holy schmolly! I also received a very fashionable black ankle brace that needs to be worn with a sock. Oh yea, I will be stylin' with that look!

The GREAT news is that I lost 8.6 lbs. in 4 weeks. Now, I know some of you may be thinking that with everything going on in my life, that is not a surprise. I probably would think the same thing if I didn't know what crap I was eating for 3 of the 4 weeks. Carbs, carbs, carbs and more carbs with a little bit of fat and protein thrown in was the norm. Think about the food that people bring to your house during these times; cake, cookies, baked ziti, baked macaroni, rice cassaroles up the ying-yang and I ate it all! Thank you oh Great Band for limiting the quanity of the devils food that passed my lips. I can assure you, that was the only thing that saved me!

If nothing else positive comes out of this past month, it has confirmed for me that my band will help me to lose weight and keep it off. I mean, really, I can only imagine what I am capable of losing with Taz (my band) if I put my mind to it and add a little (or a lot) of exercise! Word! (Thats for Amy!)

On the fill front, I now have 2.6cc's in my 4cc band after a .8 fill today.

First day back at work

Wow, I didn't think it would be so hard but I was wrong. Four weeks ago today at 12:45 p.m. I received the phone call that would change my life. I was at work at the time and that is why it was so hard walking through that door today. However, the people that I work with are unbelievable. I am very thankful to have them in my life and they made it easier. They let me cry, they let me laugh and than they said "GET BACK TO WORK"! It turned out to be a good day for me as I was busy and didn't have time to be sad.

Tomorrow I have a very busy doctor day. My fill appointment was rescheduled for tomorrow at 9:30, than, I finally have my appointment with the ankle/foot specialist that took 5 months to get! My WLS doc is about 100 miles south of my home and then the ankle guy is 100 miles NW from there. It will then be about 100 miles to get home from the ankle doc. All in all, Stephen figures it will be about 300+ miles of driving. We could be 1/4 of the way to New York! See, that's how I measure all driving time!

I have no clue what the outcome will be at the ankle/foot doc. I have excruciating pain deep down in my ankle joint when I exercise and after an MRI, my orthopedic said I had a lesion in the crevice that is somehow related to arthritis. He immediately referred me to this guy as the diagnosis was out of his league. He said he would think surgery would be involved but he wasn't sure. I do nothing halfway it seems. At first I was upset when the ortho doc suggested surgery might be the answer because I thought it would really impede my weight-loss. However, I haven't been able to exercise anyway with the exception of walking, so if surgery is the answer and its just a matter of a few weeks to heal, I would be ok with that. As long as it fixes the problem of course. Anyway, I will find out tomorrow.

Its funny how....***Edited***

when you see or read something it turns into something else in your head. I just read the post from Work In Progress and now I cannot get the song "Build me up Buttercup" out of my head. Except that its not "Build me up Buttercup" its "Fill me up Buttercup" as I am getting a fill later today with Dr. D. I will try to contain myself and not sing when I see him coming at me with the needle!

On the Peanut butter cup front, I am so with Work In progress that they are heaven in a cup! I can still remember those commercials where the guy walking down the street with his chocolate bar crashes into the guy with the jar of peanut butter and says "Hey, your peanut butter is in my chocolate bar...No, your chocolate bar is in my peanut butter!" or something like that. I was definitely ahead of the curve on Peanut Butter Cups as I always painted my Hershey bar with peanut butter! If only I brought the idea to Hershey sooner!

Anyway, yesterday I was with Stephen in Walmart and all of a sudden I started to get the sweats like I was having a low blood sugar episode and I was craving chocolate or something I knew would take care of the feeling to get my blood sugar up. I quickly made my way over to the protein bars and found a Snickers Marathon Energy Bar. I actually compared the nutrition label to a package of Reeces Peanut Butter Cup and while the Marathon bar was only 10 calories less at 210, it had 14 grams of protein compared to 5 on the RPBC and it had half the fat. I am not a protein bar person but I have to say, it was really good. I didn't buy more as I thought it could be a problem for me but I have to say that I may buy some protein bars to have in case of emergencies such as that. Any recommendations?

I will check back in later after my fill.

****EDITED*****
Fill has been postponed until Wednesday at 9:30 due to an emergency(Doc's, not mine!. Will update fill info at that time!

Happy Hot Summer Meltdown Challenge Day!!

Good Morning my Pretty's...I am so pumped for this challenge. I want to wish all of us good luck and I'm looking forward to seeing a lot less of us come August 1st! I just took my pic and emailed to Kristen so now I am officially in Hot Summer Meltdown mode!

Nothing much planned for today except running a few errands with Steve. It actually feels good to just relax and have nowhere to go.

Our girls got home safe last night a little after midnight after driving for 17 hours from our home in FL to Long Island. The house is so quiet with them gone. Jordan actually has started to talk to us about moving here with us and that makes me VERY HAPPY but I am afraid to get to excited just yet! Fingers crossed. I will see Mallory, Kevin and my niece for the long 4th of July weekend as they will be coming with Elayna (my sisters daughter). Steve, Brutus and I will be driving up to LI at the end of July for a week which will be great.

I've attached a pic from our day at Magic Kingdom along with one of Steve showing off his new tattoo in Vegas. I teased him that it makes him look so tough to which he said "I don't have to LOOK tough, I am a cop and I have a gun!"





I have a question for you all....how much do you eat at every meal? I am a little confused. I have heard some people say that they only eat 4 oz. at every meal. I am going to my doctor tomorrow and will ask him but I'm curious. My doctor in Mexico who did my surgery had me speak with a nutritionist who told me 1 cup in total volume at every meal is the norm. So, what are you doing?

SIDE BAR...I am sitting in my little room off my bedroom smelling freshly baked Croissants baking in the oven! Me and my great ideas to buy my husband these frozen Croissants from William Sonoma for his birthday. He loves them so much though so it was a good choice as he is so hard to buy for! He even bakes them himself so I can make myself scarce when they are baking.

Have a great Sunday everyone!

Wii Fit & Blahs

The blahs are because my prescious daughters left this morning heading back to Long Island. This always makes me sad and this particular trip was a gazzilion times worse. My father was supposed to drive from his house to visit them while they were here. Instead, we drove to his house for his memorial service. Will I ever be able to go one day without crying? I know I will but right now that just doesn't seem possible.

Ok, get a grip Jax! On a good, fun note, my 80 year old father was the proud owner of a Wii that I seem to have inherited. I bought a Wii Fit and this morning watched as my Mii went from this skinny little thing to a "plumper" version when I was weighed! How funny was that? Not very actually but I suppose it really is funny.

I was not happy about the weight on the Wii as it was 2.4 lbs higher than my bathroom scale with the same clothes on. I am convinced it has to do with the rug its on but whatever. It is what it is and as long as it goes down I will be fine. I am only showing a 2.5 lb loss during the past 4 weeks and while I know why its only a 2.5 lb loss, its still making me crazy. I feel like I wasted the last 4 weeks with my band. Monday is my 2nd fill and I pray that will zap me back into form!

I had cottage cheese for breakfast today and plan on having some turkey salad for lunch. Bread AND chips are definitely on the DO NOT EAT LIST which is probably not a bad thing! For dinner I will be having some lean steak on the grill (hopefully) and some spinach. I may have a protein shake if I feel like a need a little something for a snack. I am really going to be watching my calories and making sure I get my protein it. I know that these two things are the reason why my scale has not been so nice to me lately. Oh, and let me not forget, WATER, WATER and more WATER!

I am keeping my fingers crossed that I can see a little more movement on the scale between now and Monday at 2 pm!

1. If you could live anywhere in the world - where would it be and why?

Italy or to be more specific, the Amalfi Coast. Steve and I went there on our honeymoon and it was a magical place and I have memories of that trip that will last a lifetime.

2. How old were you when you got drunk for the 1st time?

16

3. What was your favorite toy growing up?

I loved the Barbie Camper.

4. What's your favorite season and why?

Fall because it always seemed like a new beginning.

5. Repeat question....which blog or comment spoke to you or stuck with you the most this week?

I am just coming back to life after going through hell for the last 3 weeks. Unfortunately, I have not been a very good blogger so I have to pass on this for this week.

Back in the Land of the Living!

We took the girls (and Kevin) to the Magic Kingdom yesterday and we had a "magical day"! It was so frikkin hot and than around 4:00 the torrential rain came! Thankfully, we had not stopped for lunch so we found a table at one of the restauants and had taco's. We got on the road to drive home around 5:30. It was so good to relax and just have fun with the family. I am so happy that we did this...actually, it was Steves idea.

The 3 of them are leaving tomorrow :( but will be back for a long 4th of July weekend. Steve and I will be driving up to NY for a week at the end of July. I cannot wait for that to roll around as I really miss my family.

I am going for my 2nd fill on Monday and it cannot come too soon! I am also going back to the gym next week so watch out girls...I am in the Summer Meltdown Challenge and I AM BACK!!!!

Family

Thats really what life is about, right? My sister and her children just left for the airport to go home. Now that we know that Daddy and Jimmy have been laid to rest, my wish is that all of us can begin the healing process and begin to live again.

My daughters, Mallory and Jordan and Mallory's fiance Kevin are here until Saturday. We will be going to Disney tomorrow for the day as Kevin hasn't been there since he was 3! I am not sure what park they will choose but all that matters is that we will be together and will have fun!

Tonight will be the first time in 3 weeks that I have cooked dinner and I am so looking forward to it! The scale has not been my friend during this period of eating out, believe me! I also will be drinking all my water today for the first time and I know that my body goes into "hang onto every single calorie I eat" mode when I do not drink enough. Mallory and I even went for a nice brisk 2.5 mile walk this morning. We will be doing a lot of walking tomorrow and than we plan on going to the gym on Friday morning.

Yes, I think that I am ready to begin healing.